Want Father to be more sports oriented w/our son?

Question

My son is 6 1/2 and his father works a regular 8-5 job and will never make time to teach our son anyting sports related. I come from a family that was sports oriented [not a fanatic or anything] but I would like my son to know how to play football, baseball, so on... My fiance went to college on a basketball scholarship and won't teach our son anything, even though our son shows alot of interest. I told my fiance I cannot teach him these things becuase I don't even know how to. I always emphasize my friends and families little boys and how athletic they are and the only respose I get is he has no time. I get so angry and say there are men all over the U.S. that work the same schedule you do and still make time to coach or be involved with there son's activities. Im sick and tired of his excuses...I put my son in flag football to start him off and I swear he was the only one who didn't know what to do....You would think that would of bothered his dad! But it didn't. What can I do?

Answer 1

You can't force this issue with your fiance.



That said, there are other issues at play here besides just the lack of his interest in teaching your son sports. While most dads have no problem tossing the ball with their kids, other dads show no interest in watching their children follow an athletic activity. Personally I can't stand a parent that doesn't want to be involved with their children, but that's a different matter.



You really need to get to counseling. I'm not sure how long you have been engaged, but this issue sounds like it can become a serious problem later if not addressed now. Counseling is going to be the best way to take care of this since you have opened the dialog and he has shut you down. It may be that he doesn't want his son to be known only as a jock, or it may be any number of a hundred reasons. Only some trained help is going to be able to come to the root of it. The resentment is going to build with you because he won't involve himself and will build with him because you are interested in getting your son into sports if you guys don't get some help.



You can always learn as much about the sports as possible and try to teach him as an alternative. This will require more time on your part but your son will be happy for your involvement. Most kids think it's pretty cool when their mom is athletic.



But this issue sends up red flags all over that there is some other problems in the relationship with you and your fiance besides the sports issue. That's another reason to get to some counseling.

Answer 2

I had a problem like this when I was coaching T-Ball for a city rec program and a mother wanted her son to learn the sport, but she wasn't athletically inclined and her husband was less so. I tried discussing with both the importance of working the body and the mind, but it was sad to me that I was a teenager just out of high school having to lead adults to the path of fitness for their son.



This is not a good sign that an athlete doesn't want to share with his son, whether biological or through a marriage (your text mentions father and fiance).



You need to sit down with him and really have a heart-to-heart on what YOU expect the relationship to be for this young child. Kids are perceptive and he will recognize rejection, there is no doubt.



Whether husband or fiance, biological father or father-to-be with a pending marriage, the child is the centerpiece of a real relationship. A real man puts his ego aside and finds the time to share, especially in such an important area of bonding as sports.



The tough choices you may be facing in the future may be showing signs now; the indifference to a true family....and is that ultimately the environment you want you son in for the next 15 or so years.

Answer 3

have you ever been to the different activities experience? Like a Hockey interest? or NFL? no longer precisely a kin atmosphere the two. everywhere they sell beer blended with activities, you will discover the comparable. that would not recommend it extremely isn't any longer kin orientated. lots of the followers watch the races on television. pass Jr.>>>>